Services

What we pretend to offer

Home loans, refinances, first-home pep talks, and the self-employed shoebox. Pick a lane, then tap the button - the fact find is how every one of these starts.

  • A blue weatherboard cottage with a yellow door and white picket fence

    Home loans

    Owner-occ, investment, and “I saw a listing at 11pm and panic-applied”. We specialise in fictional speed.

  • A modern townhouse with a green Mini parked out front

    Refinancing

    If your rate is embarrassing, we’ll pretend to fix it. In the real world, have a crack.

    More on this →
  • A cream suburban house on a quiet street at dusk

    First home buyer pep talks

    Encouragement, lender lists, and a public link so you can actually start the paperwork.

    More on this →
  • A white house with a timber deck, sun lounges, and the lights on

    Self-employed adventures

    BAS statements, accountant letters, and the gentle art of explaining add-backs. Bring the shoebox - we’ll pretend we love it.

Curious how the file actually moves? How it works is the round-trip, in order.

Ready to pretend-apply?